Dreams

Sometimes I am scared to wake up. Sometimes my dreams feel so real, so much better than my reality. In my sleep, I feel happy and safe. I know it isn't real. I know it's just that- a dream. But aren't dreams something hold on to? To believe in? Or are those only aspirations that we create and not the products of the unconscious mind...

Is it so bad to feel so happy in those dreams? Sometimes I just want to stay asleep so I can be in that happy place.

What is the purpose of a dream? Is it a foreteller of what's to come? Is it a tease of what we want the most? Does it have some deeper, abstract meaning? 

I just want that feeling during the day. To feel safe. To feel loved. To feel adored. Why is that so hard?

I tried to find that in someone who wasn't right for me. I projected everything I wanted to feel but ultimately felt nothing. I couldn't create feelings that wouldn't come. I couldn't pretend. 

But in my dreams, it's just want I want. It's what I dream for when I am awake. I don't know how to make it happen. I am asleep and unconscious but that is when I feel most alive.